For the past three months, I have had the honour of housesitting and caring for five cats in Santa Fe. As my Foster Dad time comes to a close, I’m struck by how this time has transformed me.
Settling In
I have had pets most of my life, and I’m no stranger to cats. Not counting foster cats, I recall having at least nine cats at one point. And yet, with all the cats, I was always one of several humans in the home. Being the sole human in a house of five cats was a completely different experience. Add to that the knowledge that they are deeply attached to their loving mother, and I was more than a little intimidated. Would they accept me? Would they spend their time in hiding as they did when the plumber came to perform some minor repairs?
One night early in my stay, I awoke in the middle of the night. The liminal state between sleep and wakefulness left me feeling a bit mystical. I opened my heart to the cats, sending love throughout the home. To my delight, one by one, the cats appeared and crawled into bed with me. Before long, I had four of the five cats snuggled lovingly around me, and eventually even the fifth, Captain Hastings, made a brief appearance. Captain takes his military appellation seriously, so he could not stay long. Someone had to keep an eye on the rest of the house.
Going Deeper
From that point, the love between the cats and me took off like a runaway train. My prime directive was to ensure a loving, caring, energetic space for these cats while mom was away, and I opened my heart to them at every opportunity. Most evenings saw Paz, Serenity, and Aurora snuggled in bed with me, with the occasional appearance by Zeus and Captain. Even if no one joined me at bedtime, I could count on Aurora to be snuggled up between my knees when I awoke.
Loving Kindness meditation has given way to Loving Catness meditation. Paz especially loves to crawl into my lap for meditation time. When I head upstairs to find him in his favorite cat bed and tell him I’m going to meditate, he knows exactly what I mean, and he typically follows me to the basement for our daily practice. Their presence in my lap gives me inspiration to extend my practice, rather than disturb their peaceful slumber.
As I prepared for catsitting, I considered studying animal communication. How great would it be to be able to read the cats’ minds? I quickly realized it was not necessary. I re-learned what I already knew from my coaching practice. When we are fully, deeply present with another, intuition takes over. While I didn’t hear little cat voices in my head, I knew intuitively what they needed.
If you will indulge me, I would like to take a moment to celebrate each feline in turn.
Paz
Paz is older and cannot jump up on couches and chairs. He also doesn’t love to be picked up. I purchased a set of cat stairs and placed them next to my meditation couch. As he climbed those stairs for the first time and looked into my eyes, I heard him clear as day. “Thank you for understanding my needs.” Now, when I’m sitting somewhere other than that couch, he will come and stare into my eyes and gently paw at me. “Bring me my stairs.” And when I do, he climbs into my lap and floods my system with oxytocin.
Zeus
I have an affinity for sky gods. I have Thor’s hammer tattooed on my left shoulder. I was particularly drawn to the Stormfather in the Stormlight Archives books. And now I find myself in The Land of Enchantment, surrounded by open skies that showcase the work of the sky gods in a manner never possible back in Virginia. So it’s fitting for me to share a home with Zeus. He would eat everyone’s meal if I let him. He is master of the catio, and is very disappointed with me when I don’t open it up for him.
Captain Hastings
Captain is the Chief Operating Officer of the household. He’s always on watch for anything amiss. He rarely snuggles in bed, choosing to monitor the home. And he’s a professional groomer. He will see a sibling and decide, “You need a bath.” He proceeds to groom vigorously and thoroughly. I watched this morning as Serenity made a half-hearted attempt to return the favor, but his grooming was all-consuming. There have been times when he’s insisted on grooming me as well.
He also holds the house record for high jumping. I have no idea how he makes it into this cabinet, but he’s repeated the feat three times now.
Serenity
Serenity is such a sweet baby girl. She is full of spunk and often races through the house at breakneck speed. She’s the cat most likely to look down on us from above, and she loves to howl while she brings me a cat toy that she has subdued. She loves sinks, and I’ve caught her attempting to drown unsuspecting cat toys on more than one occasion.
When she has a love emergency, it’s the real deal. I’ve had several coaching sessions interrupted by her parading in front of the camera and climbing up my shoulders to make it clear where my attention should be focused.
Aurora
Early on, their mother asked me which cat was my favorite, and I told her I don’t do favorites. I love each of them in their own way. While this is still largely true, Aurora has stolen my heart. She regularly seeks me out for snuggles. She loves to slow dance. And if I let her, she’ll gently nibble my chin to show her affection. Unlike Serenity, she also has keyboard awareness and does her best to avoid the keyboard when interrupting my coaching sessions. Serenity does her best to create chaos – don’t let the name fool you!
Putting It Into Practice
I had a client who worked with me on improving his communication style at work to improve collaboration with his colleagues. Towards the end of our time together, he remarked on his progress and considered the implications in his personal life. What was possible in his personal relationships if he put the same energy into showing up at his best as he’d been doing at work?
I’ve learned a similar lesson in my time with these beloved cats. I have opened my heart to them and brought my whole self to our time together, and have been blessed with an ocean of love in return.
What’s possible if we bring this kind of love and presence to every person, animal, and plant we encounter? I invite you to pick one being close to you, and spend some energy deepening your presence with that person. Open your heart. Attune to them. The results may just be magical.
I am an executive coach and life coach with software executive roots in higher education and EdTech. I coach because I love to help others accelerate their growth as leaders and humans. I frequently write about #management, #leadership, #coaching, #neuroscience, and #arete.
If you would like to learn more, schedule time with me.
Want to comment? Join the conversation on LinkedIn.