We live in unprecedented times, and the past week has been a roller coaster ride. We will each process this in our own way, in our own time. Today, I’d like to share a few thoughts about how I’m processing, hoping it helps you form your own way of processing.
Stay Informed – In Moderation
At times in my life, I’ve avoided the news entirely. While there were some benefits to my overall stress level, it is hard to be in relationship with others without a fundamental awareness of the external factors that could be impacting them. Imagine asking a colleague who lives in Asheville, NC, why they haven’t responded the day after Hurricane Helene swept through.
I have a few trusted news sources that I consider relatively objective that I check daily and steer clear of almost everything else. This gives me the headlines, and may occasionally give me reason to dig deeper into something. But it helps me avoid over-indexing on what is going on in the world, stressing my system unhelpfully.
If I come across news from other sources, such as a story related by a friend or something in my social media feed that grabs my attention, I keep in mind that I don’t know the source. If it has caught my attention, I’ll do my homework to learn more from sources I believe are objective before I get drawn in.
I am not suggesting this is a best practice. I’m sharing the strategy that has worked for me. Consider what works for you. Whether you are taking a break from the news entirely, consuming small amounts, or spending hours a day taking it in, take a moment to reflect on whether this is serving you at this time. Experiment with different approaches if it isn’t.
Be Open
We live in a time of divisiveness. I realize I’m stating the obvious. I would love to wave a magic wand and make that divisiveness disappear, but I don’t appear to have that ability yet. What I can do is adopt a way of being that doesn’t amplify the divide.
I recognize that this approach is part of who I am. The first time the StrengthsFinders assessment told me Harmony was one of my top strengths, I was annoyed. Years later, when it was still there, I started to pay attention. I can deal with conflict but I would rather resolve it and make peace than feed it.
One way I do this is to practice mindfulness when a divisive issue surfaces. I try to be aware of the times when I instinctively jump to one side of an either/or debate. In these moments, I try my best to view the issue from the other perspective.
- What is the benefit of the alternative position?
- Why is the alternative position important to those who support it?
- What are the downsides of the position I instinctively hold?
In short, I try to be a moderate. I don’t really identify as a moderate, but I work hard to approach each controversial issue from a moderate’s perspective.
I have found a few interesting podcasts that lean away from my default viewpoint, but cover the topics rationally and objectively, not from an “us/them” perspective. I’ve found these to be great ways to expand my understanding of both sides of an issue.
Recently, several people close to me have asked for my objective opinion on an issue they are passionate about. They have asked me to help them see the other side of the issue, in an effort to understand. I am grateful that they wanted to explore the issue that way and thought of me as someone who could support that exploration.
What Is In Your Control
For many, what’s happening right now feels overwhelming. It is easy to fall into despair. I don’t think we should sweep these emotions under the rug. We need to process them, and we may need the support of a therapist to do so.
When I’m feeling helpless or hopeless or working with someone else in this space, I like to shift my thinking to what is in my control rather than all the things that are not. I may be stuck in my default mode network (DMN), a network of the brain that can be prone to rumination. When I think about things within my control and find a way to take action, I shift to my task positive network (TPN), which quiets the DMN. See my post on The Neuroscience of Doing and Being for more on these networks.
Last weekend, I had this conversation with multiple friends as I drove from Austin to Albuquerque. In each conversation, we recognized the need to quiet the worry about the things we could not control and figure out ways to contribute in a constructive way to the situation. That’s as far as we got – we struggled to find a meaningful way to contribute.
The following day, Ann Betz began to publish poems of healing. Here is one of my favorites. I find them inspiring. Ann has found a way to leverage one of her talents to contribute in a meaningful way.
Ultimately, I recognized that this blog is one of my ways of contributing, which is why I’ve chosen this topic for the week.
What gifts can you draw forth to contribute to closing the gap and healing yourself and others as we navigate this stage of our planetary journey?
Have Faith
Have faith. Easier said than done, I know. We say “a leap of faith” for a reason. As a child of modernity, most of my life I’ve had an allergic reaction to someone telling me to have faith. I didn’t want spirituality, I wanted science, facts, and logic.
My coaching journey has stimulated a profound shift for me over the past few years. I now identify as spiritual, not religious, and I’ve come to terms with the term “faith.” That faith has strengthened in part because of the vast number of synchronicities I’ve observed in my life over the past three years.
With that emergent spirituality, I’ve come to pay much more attention to my intuition. Beyond logical, rational thought, what messages am I receiving from my body? When do I feel a sense of knowing that I can’t explain? This is my awakened awareness at work.
My faith at this time comes from that intuition, supported by my own spiritual experiences and those of others I trust. They all lead to the same narrative. Yes, we are in a time of great adversity. It won’t be easy. But this time serves a purpose in our collective evolution. I have faith we’ll emerge from this period in a more evolved state, both as individuals, as a species, and as a noosphere.
If the notion of faith doesn’t resonate with you, I’ll offer a more logical approach. Think of it as a planetary growth mindset.
If we adopt a worldview that the current state is bad, completely out of our control, and not going to get better, we position ourselves in a space of hopelessness that is hard to dig out of.
If we adopt a worldview that we can improve our current situation by contributing in whatever way we can and recognize that there is always the potential for growth, we can move ourselves out of hopelessness and into a more productive space—a space of courage.
Whether faith or logic gets you there, I hope you can find your way to courage.
Putting It Into Practice
Find what works for you to navigate these times:
- Find a healthy balance with the news.
- Be open to other perspectives.
- Look for ways you can contribute.
- Have faith.
Walkabout Corner
The sign that greeted me as I crossed the border from Texas to New Mexico last weekend was “Welcome to the Land of Enchantment.” That filled my heart with joy and continues to do so every time I see a license plate bearing that phrase.
Living in the Mountain Time Zone is shaking up my snow globe more. My meetings now start at 8 am, leaving very little daylight before the day starts. I’ve become an afternoon runner once again. This has the added benefit of warmer conditions, as the desert routinely swings 30 degrees from sunrise to sunset.
That is just one example of my Journey of Neuroplasticity. May you find your own path to neuroplasticity.
I am an executive coach and life coach with software executive roots in higher education and EdTech. I coach because I love to help others accelerate their growth as leaders and humans. I frequently write about #management, #leadership, #coaching, #neuroscience, and #arete.
If you would like to learn more, schedule time with me.
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